The Seasons In Our Lives...

Christmas morning is one of my very favorite times of the whole year. Mr. Charming and I spend a good amount of the holiday season running around, working a ton and hosting multiple parties. (his work, my work, his family, my family, friends) And while we ADORE time with our loved ones, friends and co-workers, on Christmas morning there's this magical quiet time where it's just him and I alone celebrating the birth of Jesus with our fur babies and it gives me joy and peace deep into my soul. 

I'm just now getting around to recapping our Christmas. Truth be told I just got around to editing the photos Mr. Charming took with his camera and I hadn't yet decided if I wanted to speak on what really was going on during this season for us. 

But I started this blog as my journal. A place where I felt safe to expose my fears about sickness, and mental health and food issues and what I found was a community of women who were battling the same battles and dealing with the same issues and I want this space to always remain authentic.  During this season, Mr. Charming and I lost a baby a few days before Christmas. A baby that showed us we are able to conceive (hope!). A baby we have been wanting for almost two years. 

I trust God 100% in this journey, and though it was hard, really hard to lose something we've been wanting for so long, I trust that our baby will come when God feels its right. A lot of people said that this was the worst time for it to happen (thanks for that by the way, haha) I was happy that I had Christmas and something much bigger than us to focus on. The birth of Christ. Celebrating Him as a baby took the focus off of losing ours and it healed me in a way I can't explain. 

I wanted to share, as this is a deeply important part of my journey and I know it's everyones personal preference to share, and it wasn't until I was in the hospital, that so many women I know came forth with their own stories of loss. I was saddened and comforted by those stories all at the same time, to know that I wasn't alone and if anything comes of me putting this out there, its that I want anyone experiencing that pain to know, you aren't alone. 

Now that the Christmas season is behind us and a New Year is stretched out before us, we continue to live our lives, just one day at a time. Because, as I've learned, it's much to hard to try to live it in the future. 

This week we go back to the doctor for a new game plan and a specialist to take the journey with us. Your prayers and good thoughts are appreciated. I hope you all had a beautiful Christmas and a very Happy New Year! Here's to 2015!