![]() On a particularly hard day, I opened to this in "Jesus Today". I collapsed into a soul cleansing sob. Thank You for Your words always.
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That's a beautiful sentiment. And I know through Christ we can get there. But there are days, like today, where my hormones are out of whack, I'm frazzled, work was stressful, missing family time and I just don't connect to that thought like I long too.
I closed my eyes and thought about what makes my soul happy. Not my mind, nothing that is fleeting, but true deep soul happiness. I want to be in the moment more. On my phone less. I want to write more. I want to think less. I want to see family more. I want to keep to myself less. I want more adventure. Less fear. More veggies. Less cheating with grains. So. How can I do all this? Not by large changes. I am blessed. I adore my job, my home, my marriage, my relationships. What I don't adore is my stressful nature to feel like I have less than what I have when anything upsets those situations. That diminishes the blessing. And that is not my intention. So I will try to do better at taking it one moment at a time. I will try to take more deep breaths. Intentionally carve out more hours for writing and friends. And look at the good at the opportunities that lie before me. And I will continue to pray through it all, because I am me. I know my weaknesses and the habits that pull me down. May I be able to become stronger and more able to do what makes my soul happy each and every day. |
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November 2018
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